I'm coming home

I have been in Montreal, Canada for a month and a half roughly.
Yesterday I woke up bringht and early after a good nights rest ready to take a 8 hour drive back to my home in Pennsylvania.

When I got to the border Crossing I was asked to pull over and go inside to talk to the Border and Customs Patrol, not an unusual event for me. I was asked 4 million questions,finger printed,picture of me taken. After a couple of hours of being asked the same questions over and over I started to get worried but still had hope of being allowed to go on my way.

4 hours of waiting! haven't had a smoke,not allowed to use the rest room without asking permission and being watched while in the restroom after being given permission. they also let me smoke a cigarette.

5 hours of waiting! now I am really getting worried, they haven't told me anything. I am getting hungry, my stomach is rumbling. I mention to one of the officer's that I have been there for 5 hours and kinda need to eat something. he tells me soon as they are done I can get something to eat.

I ask him if I can get a soda from the machine that has been starring at me for the past 5 or so hours. He tells me I am not allowed to leave the building and he cant get it for me. Another officer tells me if I hold on a couple of minutes he will get it for me. I give him the $1.25 and ask him if he wants one also. He tells me no thanks,grabs the change and goes out to get the soda.

Hour 6. Now they have asked me to go to the office in the back with them. 2 officers ( needless to say they are intimidating ). They start asking me the same questions I have answered for the past 6 hours over and over again but I answer them AGAIN.

Hour 7. By now one of the officers has left the office and returned. He informs me that I will not be allowed entry into the USA today and that I am also being barred from ever entering the country again.

WTF I am married to an American born citizen, my two children are American citizens. I have utility bills in my name, a lease on the house we rent in my name. I work and pay taxes ( IRS sent me my tax refund 2 weeks ago ).

My life is all fucked up. I have managed to fuck up the lives of my children. How can I be a father and not be allowed to see them? there is no custody orders preventing me, I have absolutely no criminal record. I worked 6 days a week for almost 10 years trying to support my family.

My oldest daughter got married yesterday and I was not there. I did not call her or send her an email or anything. Fucking great father I am.